If Only Mama and Daddy. . .

Children know what's going on with their parents; it's just that they can't understand what they know. We affect them with our unhappiness. If only we can be happy and whole--our children can be free to relax and enjoy the wonder of childhood, their freedom and innocence intact.  If only we would devote ourselves to wholeness for ourselves and our children. Below you'll find an exerpt from Saint Sullivan's Daughter, a novel full of a child who longs for happiness and wholeness--and her parents: one who makes the choice for happiness, the other...well...read the book and find out!

When Ceci was still five, magic leaked out of the sky, not really like rain, but just as quiet and regular. Nobody was there to help her catch it. So Ceci ran into the house to tell Mama and Daddy, “It’s raining and the sun is shining! Come see!”

They were fighting about something, so they shooed her outside. That’s why Ceci had stood out in the rain, the shining drops drenching her hair, tears stinging her cheeks. If Mama or Daddy had come out to see that shiny rain, things might have been completely different. Maybe they could have been happy. 

Parents as Bridges

In the following passage, the elderly curandera Rafaela meets with Barry Sullivan in a barrio tavern.  He is just beginning to face difficult choices ahead. She speaks of parents as the bridge from heaven to earth-- a sentimental, yet powerful picture of the vulnerability of children in the world. Adults must stand on this bridge between heaven and earth as the Guardians of childhood.

           

“You might be done with the saints, but they aren’t done with you. They yearn for you to wake up to your responsibility. You wait on a bridge between heaven and everything else—spanning dangerous waters. Like the guardian angel.”

           The room chilled around Barry, as he remembered the picture Ma gave Ceci.         

            “From the moment of conception, Barry, our purpose is to guard our children from harm. Every parent is to be a bridge between heaven and earth. A child only knows heaven. Crossing into the world with all its trouble, the child is in peril. The parent is like that guardian angel, offering a hand to guide the child over the broken places. Our love makes it up to them for having to leave heaven.”

            “How—how can a lousy, no-good man do the work of an angel?”

            “Full intention, Barry, that’s what it takes. You can’t be a parent part-time.”

            “That’s the same axe Carmen grinds. Listen, I have to work, Rafaela!”

            “Everyone works, but not so far from their children. Until Cecilita is stronger she needs you close by.” She tapped her heart. “Right here! Later, she will be strong enough for you to go sometimes. Please stay with her now, amigo. Care for your daughter. Help her heal. . .not from a distance, but close up!”

Saint Sullivan's Daughter is available from the Abbott Press Bookstore and other online vendors.

"Saint Sullivan's Daughter," my new novel

Welcome to Saint Sullivan's Daughter's brand new blog.  I am the author and blogger, Claire Germain Nail. This is my first novel.  Before writing this book, I have concentrated on poetry and essay writing. This novel is straight from my heart, but it's also a culmination of years of research and learning.  To write it, I ended up studying alongside a Mexican-American curandero, as well as retracing some of my childhood excursions throughout Southern California, and reenvisioning my own childhood during the 1960's.

A self-published novel through a small press, Saint Sullivan's Daughter is available autographed by the author if you live in the Portland, Oregon metro area or nearby. Just contact me at claire.nail@gmail.com. 
Out of my local area, it can be purchased from Abbott Press Bookstore, in paperback, hardbound or as an ebook. This small press is preferable to the larger online vendors, which also carry the book and are well-known to most everyone.

Here is a brief synopsis of the story. In the weeks to come I will be sharing excerpts from the story as well as some stories regarding my journey to self-publishing. 

Barry “Saint” Sullivan is a talented jazz musician, yet something of his soul is disappearing, he knows he drinks far too much, and his career is going nowhere.  If he doesn’t get a paying gig soon, his beautiful but tempestuous wife threatens to leave for Mexico. He's just quit his job as a band music salesman.

Ceci Sullivan is their lonely six-year-old daughter, who dreams in Technicolor, converses with long-dead ancestors, and has plaster saints for playmates.  Her parents' problems taking center stage, she watches from the shadows, until a tragic accident threatens her body and soul.

A traditional Mexican healer, a curandera, knows how to help Ceci, but will her father accept the healer’s unconventional methods? The curandera asks a sacrifice that few men of this era were prepared to make.

Set primarily in Los Angeles in the summer of 1960, Saint Sullivan’s Daughter is story of the Irish-Mexican family’s journey from the rusty harbor of San Pedro, to the colorful streets, and dangerous alleys of the Latino Barrio.  There, St. Sullivan will face dangers that could end his dreams forever.